Ma is my hero
Throughout this entire novel so far, I’m constantly in awe of Ma’s character. The way she has nurtured Jack and continued to stay strong in the face of almost insurmountable odds is so inspiring, and that resilience is incredible.
Despite the adoration I feel for this character, I recognize that some of her decisions regarding Jack could be seen as reckless. Pretending he was dead in order to escape Old Nick? Genius. Also kind of insane if you think about all the ways that plan could’ve gone wrong. Jack had had barely any warning about the plan, and he could’ve fallen out of the truck by accident and died/gotten really hurt, accidentally revealed he was still alive and put himself in danger of being hurt by Old Nick, etc. A regular mother making her five year old son do things like this is absolutely unheard of.
However, Ma isn’t a regular mother and because none of us have been in her situation, I don’t think anyone can judge her for her parenting. It’s not as if she was happy to see her little boy—the only thing she thinks is worth living for—leave Room without any protection from the violent, evil monster who stripped her of her freedom and violated her for seven years. Imagine what she went through during the great escape: she had been stuck waiting, having no way to contact Jack and therefore being stuck imagining every horrible thing that could go wrong. I can’t be mad at her for endangering her child because keeping him in Room because that, too, is far from a safe environment. After the stunt Nick pulled with cutting off the power, it became evident that Ma had no choice but to get them out of there and using Jack was the only way. She did what she had to do.
Despite the adoration I feel for this character, I recognize that some of her decisions regarding Jack could be seen as reckless. Pretending he was dead in order to escape Old Nick? Genius. Also kind of insane if you think about all the ways that plan could’ve gone wrong. Jack had had barely any warning about the plan, and he could’ve fallen out of the truck by accident and died/gotten really hurt, accidentally revealed he was still alive and put himself in danger of being hurt by Old Nick, etc. A regular mother making her five year old son do things like this is absolutely unheard of.
However, Ma isn’t a regular mother and because none of us have been in her situation, I don’t think anyone can judge her for her parenting. It’s not as if she was happy to see her little boy—the only thing she thinks is worth living for—leave Room without any protection from the violent, evil monster who stripped her of her freedom and violated her for seven years. Imagine what she went through during the great escape: she had been stuck waiting, having no way to contact Jack and therefore being stuck imagining every horrible thing that could go wrong. I can’t be mad at her for endangering her child because keeping him in Room because that, too, is far from a safe environment. After the stunt Nick pulled with cutting off the power, it became evident that Ma had no choice but to get them out of there and using Jack was the only way. She did what she had to do.
I agree that we can't judge the absolutely impossible situation Ma was in. It was a massive risk, but it paid off in a big way. While it was a horrible and traumatic event for Jack, getting out of Room would have been an even more difficult transition the older and less plastic he got. Staying in Room granted them a uneasy sort of peace and a temporarily happy existence for Jack, but it was always teetering on the verge of shattering, and Ma knew that the older Jack got, the more he'd see the true horror of their situation. I think that Ma creating the plan and helping Jack execute it was absolutely brilliant, not to mention the way she parented him being, generally, the best she could've done, given the situation.
ReplyDeleteI really like your point that no one can judge Ma's parenting because understanding her motives and actions without having a shred of knowledge of the state she reigned herself (then overcame!!) to. Ma's parenting cannot be comprehended through "normal" measures of parenting. I do want to point out, she does prepare Jack as thoroughly as she could for the Great Escape, though unknowingly. Through games like Corpse, tales of heroes, and a lifetime of trust and security, Ma gave Jack both all of herself and all the tools he needed for success. She's amazing. Great post, Mary!
ReplyDeleteI am also amazed with how Ma has been able to deal with everything the way she has. Of course, she has times when she's "gone," which is completely understandable and it seems like it happens often enough that Jack has a name for it and knows how to deal with it. I find it impressive that she is not always in such a depressed state after all her escape attempts failed up until Plan B. Her ability to not only stay strong for Jack, but also to keep a day filled and educate him with all the resources she has might even seem superhuman.
ReplyDeleteWhen you mentioned how the Great Escape was reckless, it made me think about what the media would do if they knew more about how Jack and Ma got out. They've already been critical of Ma's parenting decisions, but I can barely imagine what sorts of things that interviewer would have to say about the Great Escape if they hadn't been trying to spin it as a rescue.
ReplyDeleteNice post. I agree, I think nobody can really judge Ma's actions and also I think that even if they were going to, they would be crazy impressed. At least the way Donaghue puts it. Jack is hyperverbal and has a great sense of math at a very young age. Ma's patience is something that really makes me admire her - I don't understand how someone can be that patient with a child 24 hr/day and also never not see them. That is what makes her my hero. She overcame that personal challenge in order to give Jack a loving upbringing in a completely stark and unloving environment.
ReplyDeleteMa is such a wonderful hero, so superhuman in so many respects and yet still so human and raw. As you say, there's nothing we can do or say from the side, as people who aren't in her shoes. I didn't feel like the escape plan was very reckless, but a necessary risk that had to be taken. Hooray for Donoghue for creating such an impeccably respectable character.
ReplyDeleteMa is both an amazing mother and a wonderful hero, and you can see that in her many strengths. I think one other important thing about Ma's heroism is how it is in comparison with Jack's. Jack's journey is about adjusting to a new world, where Ma's is about reentering an old world and reckoning with what that means for her.
ReplyDeleteHeros have almost always been revered and respected in our society. They have come in all kinds of shapes and sizes, and Ma is a superb example of a hero we love and respect even though she can't fly or run faster than a speeding airplane. Ma's ability to just take what she gets and protect Jack in any way she can. She doesn't need those superpowers to be an amazing hero and person.
ReplyDeleteThe fact that she had to wait while her 5-year-old son faked death and represented either their freedom, or very likely their death is heroic in its own right. There is literally nothing you could do while waiting, and while waiting she probably devoted her entire time to just praying it went through fine.
ReplyDeleteAlso, this isn't the first time this has happened. Ma had to go through almost the exact same thing with Jack's birth, hoping and praying it wouldn't be another stillbirth, or that she would die in the process. This makes her even more heroic.
I think the most impressive feat from Ma is her commitment to making jack HER son, not Old Nick's. that is also why she got so mad at her father for thinking of Jack as Nick's son. Ma's origin story for jack coming in through Skylight is also a way to remind her that jack is not Nick's.
ReplyDeleteIn other words: water is wet. Just kidding, nice post. In the first half of the book, Ma is a real-life superhero. In the second half, she transitions to an ordinary human, and I think I like that more than if she just stayed Super Ma for the entire book it would have felt kind of unrealistic, and to be honest, the second half of the book was more intriguing to me than the first half. Because of Ma, Jack suffers pretty much no trauma, and Ma takes on the full load.
ReplyDeleteI was amazed with Ma's patience with Jack even though she's with him every second. Spending extended amounts of time with a kid can get very difficult, and Ma's done it for five straight years. I imagine doing the same routine every day would get very tiresome, especially when you're trapped in a room. It was also very impressive to me how she managed to shield Jack from most of the stress and pain she experienced throughout the book.
ReplyDeleteMa is incredibly heroic and actually did a good job of raising Jack, given her situation; she literally only had bad options to choose from. Additionally, it's clear that Ma is extremely selfless and willing to give everything for Jack. She always works to protect Jack (she even does so after they escape Room). We see Ma's tender moment with Jack before he pretends to die, showing that she loves Jack and doesn't want to send him on this impossible mission (but it's their only option).
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